I found this picture free online.

In 2017 I was feeling a bit in over my head. But I guess if we can do it all on our own, we don’t need God. Being part of the human race I like most others tend to give time, thought and effort to the things I deem necessary to what ever I am giving my energy too at any given time. I was in part learning to lean on God more.

We had just navigated the waters of a pastoral change. Going from a pastor my age, to a couple half my age that I still believe are related in someway to the Energizer Bunny. I was on the board of the newly opened Woman and Children’s Shelter. This is the same point my husbands health started to deteriorate.

The following I can’t say I wrote it. I can only say I wrote it down. It came during a morning prayer time. One of those things that just kind of flows through you, more than to you.

I found this a few days ago as I was sorting through some old spiral notebooks.

I also had it saved on my computer, but it has been quite a few years since I read it.

The Pioneer and the Stream

          I saw a woman trudging up a stream. The Lord was on the bank with his hands reaching as she neared the bank. As she approached the bank it became clear the lady was me. As I climbed out of the water the long cotton dress I wore seemed to become heavier with each step.

          As I walked up the bank the memory of my 15 yr old brother Marty Jo flooded my thoughts. He too had been in the water with heavy wet clothes and lost his battle from the weight of them. He went home to live with Jesus that day: 30 years ago.

          The Lord reassured me that the water I was in or would be in would not drown me. I would always be able to stand firm on solid ground.  As I looked in the distance I saw more streams and even one larger body of water. But it was as if I was able to see into each of them at the same time. All appeared clear and about waste deep.

          As we walked together it seemed that most of our communication was in thought and not words. I saw the flowers and heard the birds overhead. It came immediately as if he was answering without words a questions I hadn’t yet ask. “If I care for the birds overhead and these flowers you see, why would you entertain the thought that I would not care for you.

          As we walked together an almost unexplainable breeze blew. Each step became less of an effort. It didn’t feel like a warm slow wind, rather almost a presence. At the same time I noticed it was drying my clothes. I then became aware that it was also restoring my hope.

          I was remembering how at times while walking in the water my legs seemed impossible to lift and my hope a faint mist in the distance.

          Walking with Jesus, hearing the birds and smelling the fragrance of all the gorgeous flowers; gave me an unexplainable renewed strength.  I could almost touch the hope as it returned.

          I could see in the distance another stream. Without words he said “You won’t drown and I won’t leave.

          Not wanting to complain or seem ungrateful for the breeze, the flowers and birds and time with Him, I spoke softly. I asked can I get some other clothes; this dress is so heavy when I walk in the water. He said “No you can’t exchange it; YOUR GARMENT IS YOUR CALL. To which I replied but this is so heavy when I walk. I look, and feel like an old pioneer woman. He turned and with the first audible words, he said “Hope YOU ARE A PIONEER”.

It seemed as if only a short time had past when Jesus stepped into the water, then reached for my hand and gently guided me into the next stream. This time we walked side by side and spoke with our mouths. He said the following as we walked. “Stay in the center as you walk, be mindful of ripples in the water; this indicated there are obstacles just under the surface. You can be tripped up quite easily. Remember to walk in the center the dark colors near the bank is where predators like to hold up. Keep your eyes on what’s ahead .There will be times you will notice a path coming down on the bank. These are areas where things repeatedly come to get refreshed, you also have need for times of refreshment, be careful not to allow them to pass by, by mistaking them for laziness or lack of commitment. Most of all I will always be close by. If your load gets heavy cast it on me. If you start to stumble take my hand. It is I that has led you into this stream and it is I who will lead you out. I will not let you drown and you will never walk alone. Then just as it began he was gone and yet I did not feel alone. My dress was wet and heavy and yet I felt renewed. For a split second I was thinking but why Lord. As if he interrupted my thoughts with the words Just Walk pioneer Just Walk.

I also found this photo on the internet.

When people ask me how I could get through losing two members of my immediate family members in 4 1/2 years. I can only say Because He promised I would not drown and that He would never leave. I am still here , and so is He!!

Blessings! Thanks for reading!

Tonight in our Pastor’s sermon he spoke of the 2 year old that is with them right now. He said when he wants me to pick him up he does say anything he just lifts his hands up. I then know that he just needs me to hold him. He then said ” are there times you just need God to hold you? Just lift up your hands. Oh what a great reminder.